D “Carnival Bazodeeness” Epidemic

21 10 2007

[odeo=http://odeo.com/audio/17152833/view] 

Carnival Bazodeeness is the phenomenon where females lose all rational sense of self and enter into a full throttle tailspin of hysteria where they eat, breath and sleep carnival.  This chronic condition affects the mind and distorts any inkling of rational thought these women may have had before the first band launch. So just how do you identify a woman afflicted with the Bazodeeness you ask?  Here are some of the behavioral characteristics.

When it comes to mas, its all about being a side, front, back and middle line hoe.  They even have this ting called “2 band hoe”.   Now a “2 band hoe” from what I understand is a female who will register with 1 band, play with that band on Carnival Monday. She will then sell her costume to another “2 band hoe” in another band and then buy a costume from another “2 band hoe” in yet another band and play with that same band on Tuesday.  If yuh ask me dese hoes are just confused.  Ah even read 1 time about “2 band hoes” recycling dey draws.

All sense of financial responsibility is suspended.  Carnival loan? Of course…its only debt.  Rent? It can wait.  I must use that $750 for the only costume I like in the only band I must be in because I must be fantabulous on Monday “gold will go nice with my complexion”. But I think Ill sell it fun ah next band on Tuesday. “purple will go great with my complexion”.

A woman under the Bazodee will register for band when they not even sure they going to carnival.  They will pay for costume before they buy a plane ticket, before they finalize accommodations, and before they even secure vacation days.  When they DO know they are going and nothing will stop them, they will watch the cheap $400 fares go by and wait till 2 months before mas to buy a $900 ticket. 

Funny Story.  So ah watching a movie called The Black Orpheus   which was done in 1959 and was centered arrung d madness of Carnival in Rio de Janeiro.  Well one of d characters name was Serafina, and to imagine all d way in Brazil dey kno bout dis Bazodeeness.  Well to make a long story short, d woman was so Bazodee over Carnival dat she spend all she money on a costume and only ha onions in d house to eat. 

Unhealthy dietary practices to fit into their costumes are a norm.  Beyonce’s lemon juice, syrup and cayenne pepper diet for 10 straight days?? Atkins? South Beach? Starvation? Then do 5 hours in the gym, 7 days a week, with 3 different personal trainers?  Mind you….this usually starts about 2 weeks before they have to play mas but “I can lose 25 lbs in a week, I’ve done it before!” responses to this behavior is common.

Pregnancy? No excuse to miss carnival when they afflicted with the Bazodee.  I’ll just sit on the truck and come out to cross de stage.
 
Pending Eviction? I was moving anyway..
 
Snowstorm the day of your flight resulting in cancellation?  No scene…..They’ll pay another $500 for a one way ticket with layovers in Bangladesh, Surinam and the Margarita Islands before they catch a ferry to their final destination.  As long as they get there before Jouvert, it doesn’t matter.
 
Death won’t stop these women from playing mas.  Their last dying wishes will be for friends and family members to carry their coffins across deh stage fuh 1 more whine.
 
Fear the Bazoodee…  It’s easier to rehab from a crack habit than to cure the Bazoodee
 
 

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4 responses

22 10 2007
Canboulay

Thanks for yuh response, but at d same time yuh missing d big picture. In both instances these women cannot afford their Carnival bazodee habits. In the present time examples given, they not paying dey rent and probably doh even own a house. But they willing to splurge up to $3000 a year to go shake dey ass. Serafina was living in a shack and only had onions as food after she spend all she money on a new costume. Bottomline is if yuh house not in order, yuh shouldnt be splurging on Carnival. Carnival has cultural value and is a release from reality for some people. At the same time 1 should keep their priorities in front of them at all times, if yuh doh have expendable cash, then yuh shouldnt be spending yuh rent money on a costume, plane ticket or fetes. Doh worry, Wining Kriminals also here to expose d exploitation of Carnival. Further more, of the 2 sexes men are the more responsible carnival paricipants.

22 10 2007
cheyenne

It is important, that you make the distinction between Sarafina and “Susan”. One thing is that it is important that you recognize that the 1950’s-60’s is a very different time period, when government authorities were constantly fighting to repress carnival celebrations. For a poor community in the outskirts of Rio, carnival is one of the best evidence of cultural survival. This is very different from carnival in Trinidad and Brazil today. Carnival is being manipulated by capitalisim, which is why you have women who pay the $750.00 to be apart of the escapade and men who are willing to splurge to fulfill their lustful dreams( thrusting on women, who are only clothed with feathers and beads).

24 10 2007
Mas In Yuh Ass

LOVE IT!!! This site has been added to my favorites.

14 11 2007
DTriniInMe

ROFL, LMAO, & LOL.

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