Assume Yuh Position

19 10 2007

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Fellas, Fellas, Fellas,

I know plenty of allyuh feel as though yuh have it all under control and yuh woman does laughingly allow yuh to continue that thought pattern. Luckily fuh allyuh I am here to set yuh straight. My name is Sweet Ting and I am going to let allyuh in on a few little secrets. I know plenty of allyuh does run around here “Stupid is as Stupid Does” so I am blessing you all with my presence to put yuh mind in order. Doh dig no horrors cuz I does give it to allyuh straight. Plain talk bad manners!

We are going to begin today’s discussion with playing your carnival position. Ah does see plenty of allyuh carnival time walking around like yuh being lead by an invisible leash. Some of my fellow women have mastered the art of leading you and making you feel as though yuh leading yuhself. Doh get tie up…ah does promote dat too eh…but right now I am here fuh allyuh.

I know you sitting there scratching yuh balls and saying yeah what dis woman talkin about? Eh no woman leading me! I am de man! Well, eh heh…let we look at the top five classic symptoms of de invisible leash. There are many more but fuh now as allyuh are just beginners ah doh want to put yuh into total shock. Just leh we take a look:

  1. You doh even know what section yuh playin in…yuh woman done organize everything fuh you so you doh have that headache. She sweet eh?
  2. Every fete you think sounds interesting you must run by yuh woman to make sure allyuh free dat night. This is because she is so thoughtful she does arrange allyuh full fete itinerary and tickets in advance so you doh have to trouble yuhself wit dat.
  3. All yuh partnas get together and planning to play in a particular band or section fuh Monday and Tuesday. They call you to see if you want to register wit dem. You say nah man my woman done handle my stories, me and she playing in de same section.
  4. Carnival time…everybody on de road having a time and liking deyself…man wining on woman and woman wining on man. Liquor flowing and everything nice. You carrying yuh woman carry all bag and waiting fuh when she decide to wine because she don’t want she make up running before she reach de stage.
  5. Ash Wednesday reach and de boys looking to go lime by de beach and cool out. Dey call and ask yuh where yuh reach. You say yuh cooling out home relaxing wit a beer and watching TV. Yuh woman tired and she feet bunning from she heels yesterday so no beach today.

Well yes! If you can recognize at least 2 scenarios on this list it is possible you are being lead by an invisible leash. Don’t be alarmed! We can slowly remove this leash painlessly and effortlessly. But it will take some time and dedication. Don’t allyuh go running through de house like ah set ah schoopidees demanding fuh de leash removal nah. Yuh woman will not admit to it. In fact she will cuss yuh and you may end up calling Tyrone, yes. Allyuh just stay calm. The first step is admittance. Allyuh stay tuned and I will keep in touch. Follow my lead and allyuh go see carnival in a whole new light. For now I need to go cook meh man some food and let him think his invisible leash still on me. But dat is a next story. Later allyuh.

This is Sweet Ting signing off!

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9 responses

21 10 2007
lovey

So how this woman just giving up all the info so? She just made all the men wise…

22 10 2007
Sweet Ting

Well my dear…I have brothers so I feel the obligation to make dem know not to get tie up. If yuh good at yuh job yuh will be sitting down on yuh man face he wouldn’t even have time to read this blog. Keep up!

22 10 2007
lovey

Why you so defensive?! This is suppose to be for fun! Get ah blasted grip!

23 10 2007
Sweet Ting

Defensive/? Oh gosh annuda sensitive type…cool yuhself and have a time nah gyul. Not sorry if yuh offended…but stick around and keep reading!

1 11 2007
retro

I do love the class of this blog……….good job guys

15 12 2007
Idetrorce

very interesting, but I don’t agree with you
Idetrorce

16 12 2007
Robber Talk

thats all you have to say??? well, thanks for your brilliant insight.

16 12 2007
Sweet Ting

Well idiotrorce elaborate nah…what yuh doh agree with dear?

28 01 2008
Ang

Well yes! I have a coworker/friend who needs to read this! LOL LOL LOL

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